? R U - The Most Important Question of All

? R U

? R U Well, who are you? (Who are you? Who, who, who, who?)
I really wanna know (Who are you? Who, who, who, who?)
Tell me, who are you? (Who are you? Who, who, who, who?)
'Cause I really wanna know (Who are you? Who, who, who, who?)
Chorus – ‘Who Are You?’ The Who

? R U - ‘Who are you?’ The theme song of the fantastically popular TV show Crime Scene Investigation (C.S.I.) blasts out to confront us with the most important question of life. Without answers to this question your life will never have a sense of Purpose. Without the ability to clearly articulate who you are, you cannot experience the Passion all of us desperately seek in life. Without that Passion you will never have the motivation or fuel to demonstrate and sustain exceptional Performance.

C.S.I. is about the discovery of Evidence. Life Scene Investigation (L.S.I.) focuses on discovering the Evidence that is necessary to answers to the question, ‘Who Are You?’ ? R U Forensics is all about answers, answers to questions, questions about Evidence. Where, what, why, who, how etc. This question is as old as man. Philosopher Soren Kierkegaard, asked these forensic questions about the meaning and purpose of life:

Where am I? Who am I?
How did I come to be here?
What is this thing called the world?
How did I come into the world?
Why was I not consulted?
And If I am compelled to take part in it,
Where is the director?
I want to see him.

He wanted answers! He needed answers! He demanded answers! He really wanted to know! That is what this book will give you; answers. My hope and my deepest desire are that it will help you answer the most important question of all, ‘Who am I?’ - ? R U That is what I have seen it do in the lives of others.

What answers do you have for that question? If put on the spot now, right now how would you answer the question, ? R U. I am asking, this is not a dress rehearsal or hypothetical question you are not obliged to answer, it is being asked here and now!

? R U Imagine yourself in a court room, in the witness box and ready to swear to tell the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth. You are not allowed to take the fifth, take a pass or refuse to answer. What would you say to a jury who wanted to know the answer to the question, ? R U This question needs to be answered while you are alive and the sooner the better.

Why would you wait for your life to be over and then for people to ask, ‘Who were you?’ This question has been asked many times in a C.S.I. episode when a body has been found and the identity is yet unknown. If you were lying in the coroner’s office and they began to seek answers to that question, what would they find?

What to this point in your life is known about you? What can be found about the school you go to or went to? Who are your friends and what would they tell of your life? How would people describe you and your personality, the person they see each day? What accomplishments, what accolades, how was your life known, where did you come from, who did you connect to in relationships, what were your beliefs, how did those beliefs guide your life, what schools did you attend, what lives did you affect, what joy and gratitude did you display, and on and on. ‘Who were you?’ None of us want to think about the possibility of lying cold on a coroners slab and having our identity the subject of a C.S.I. investigation. But what if? So, ‘? R U’.

Catherine Willows - "Well, we still don't know how or why he died."
Gil Grissom - "Well, we know how he lived."
(CSI - Primum Non Nocere)

Locard’s Forensic Exchange Principle

Edmond Locard was one of the father’s of Forensics, made this statement about life that describes what we will be looking for.

'Wherever he steps, whatever he touches, whatever he leaves, even unconsciously, will serve as a silent witness against him. Not only his fingerprints or his footprints, but his hair, the fibers from his clothes, the glass he breaks, the tool mark he leaves, the paint he scratches, the blood or semen he deposits or collects. All of these and more, bear mute witness against him. This is Evidence that does not forget. It is not confused by the excitement of the moment. It is not absent because human witnesses are. It is factual Evidence. Physical Evidence cannot be wrong, it cannot perjure itself, it cannot be wholly absent. Only human failure to find it, study and understand it, can diminish its value.' (Locard Exchange Principle - Professor Edmond Locard)

This forensic principle states that you leave Evidence EVERYWHERE you go. The purpose of Forensics and Life Scene Investigation is to collect that Evidence and see what that Evidence tells us about your Purpose in life!

Locard’s Forensic Exchange Principle – Revised

One of the ways you need to think as you apply the Forensic C.S.I. model/process to L.S.I. is to focus on how what we look for. Here is the L.S.I. version of the Locard Principle:

'Wherever you step, whatever you touch, whatever you leave, even unconsciously, will serve as an open witness for you. Not only your fingerprints or your footprints, the calm your presence brings, the songs you sing, the baseballs you throw, people you motivate, the piano you play, the truth you hold in the face of pressure, the photographs you take, the patient you heal, the patience you demonstrate, the part you act in a play. All of these and more, bear loud witness of your Unique Design. This is Evidence that does not forget. It is not confused by the excitement of the moment. It is not absent because human witnesses are. It is factual Evidence. Physical, Intellectual, Social, Emotional, Spiritual/Motive Evidence cannot be wrong, it cannot perjure itself, it cannot be wholly absent. Only your failure to find it, study and understand it, can diminish its value to discovering your Purpose in Life.' (L.S.I. Creator Mark R. Demos)

Life Scene Investigation (L.S.I.) is about life, your life. It is not theoretical. It is a process about discovering life, your life. You leave Evidence of who you are all around you every day. You leave Evidence of your presence, your actions, your connections, your relationships, your motives, your thinking, your decisions, your accomplishments, your attitudes, your Unique Design and Strengths. Everything you do leaves DNA (Physical DNA, Intellectual DNA, Social DNA, Emotional DNA and Spiritual/Motive DNA) that defines and describes you. L.S.I. will help you discover that Evidence, not just any Evidence but Evidence that is based on your Design and the Strengths displayed by it.

Jimmy Tadero: “What never lies?”
Catherine Willows: “The Evidence.”

? R U

THERE IS ALWAYS A WAY !

THERE IS ALWAYS A WAY! So what is it? I don't know other than I know there is always a way! I have faced times like these with a few added ingredients made to sour and I am here today to tell you, 'THERE IS ALWAYS A WAY!'

That sounds like a great bumper sticker and pius platitude but it doesn't pay the bills, make sure I still have a job next month and it certainly doesn't make me popular with the family.

I think the first element of what it is I believe is that we need to believe, THERE IS ALWAYS A WAY! One way or the other, THERE IS ALWAYS A WAY! This is not a happy thought but a reality. If you are alive and breathing and reading this blog, you have found a way, at least to this point. I don't know where you have been, what path you have taken, what odds you have fought against. What I do know is that you found a WAY!

How are families coping with all the stress? How do we hold our families together in times like these? Some families are not and are breaking apart at the seams.

I met with an old friend last Friday who is graciously giving me his time and expertise to help me with my business. He is a well known businessman on the Eastside. He told me over lunch that a developer friend of his knew six men, who owned construction companies, that had committed suicide recently. I wondered about the families left behind and the devastation of wives and children. I have continued to think about that this whole week. I kept thinking about what I could do to help and what I could have done if I had the opportunity to speak to these men and their families. What would I have said and done? I would have told them, THERE IS ALWAYS A WAY!

The economy is beyond anything we could have ever imagined. People have lost their jobs. Some have lost their life's savings and retirement. Families have lost their homes. The whole world seems to be in crisis. THERE IS ALWAYS A WAY!

So if, THERE IS ALWAYS A WAY, how do we find it? It is said the 'Necessity is The Mother on Invention'. God has given us minds to think, emotions to respond and feel, friends and family to support and be supported by, the capacity to pray and ask for guidance; we lack nothing. It is in times like these that we have to rely on and use those God-Given Strengths He has endowed us with.

We have to ask how we can meet the needs of others who are desperate for those Strengths we have to offer and give. What unique capacities or Strengths do you bring to this crisis? What Strengths have enabled you to survive through other tough times? What depths have you been in and managed to rebound from? What do you know about, THERE IS ALWAYS A WAY!

THERE IS ALWAYS A WAY! If that is true we cannot give up. We cannot take exits from life that leave those we love to fend for themselves without our presense and Strength. For each one of us we need to think seriously about what we have and what it is we can invest in an economy that has been financially devestated. Human capital, YOUR UNIQUE STRENGTHS, invested in the lives of other people is the surest way to navigate throught this recession.

THERE IS ALWAYS A WAY! I know that because I know that. I Know that because I know God made us strong enough to rely on Him and He also constructed us with the capacities to bear whatever comeS our way. Don’t give up. Don’t throw in the towel! THERE IS ALWAYS A WAY!

Please share your thoughts and what you know about finding a WAY!

What Evidence Did You Leave Today?

I just read a great article about Fingerprint Evidence. The article talked about just how much a Fingerprint can reveal about the person who leaves it behind. Not only can a Fingerprint identify us by the unique patterns, coded only to the person who leaves it, but it can tell so much more.

http://dsc.discovery.com/news/2008/12/10/fingerprint-drugs.html

The more includes if we have certain diseases, have genetic predispositions to diseases or if we have taken a variety of illegal drugs and what we have done: fired a gun or handled explosives.

For those who work as C.S.I'.s (Crime Scene Investigators) this information is invaluable in identifying and convicting a criminal. The world of evidence that is found when a Fingerprint is discovered and lifted from a crime scene is incredible.

One of the foundational principles of Forensics is the Locard Exchange Principle, which says:

'Wherever he steps, whatever he touches, whatever he leaves, even unconsciously, will serve as a silent witness against him. Not only his fingerprints or his footprints, but his hair, the fibers from his clothes, the glass he breaks, the tool mark he leaves, the paint he scratches, the blood or semen he deposits or collects. All of these and more, bear mute witness against him. This is evidence that does not forget. It is not confused by the excitement of the moment. It is not absent because human witnesses are. It is factual evidence. Physical evidence cannot be wrong, it cannot perjure itself, it cannot be wholly absent. Only human failure to find it, study and understand it, can diminish its value.' (Professor Edmond Locard)

For the L.S.I. (Life Scene Investigator) we want those who we are helping discover evidence of their Unique Design and Strengths to understand they are leaving evidence wherever they go.

Question: "Where have you been today and what evidence of your Unique Strengths did you leave behind?"

Think back over today from the moment you woke up, through the day and now to whatever time you are reading this BLOG. Trace your footsteps to every place: your bedroom, bathroom, breakfast, car/bus/train, office/school/other, lunch room, Starbucks, meetings, phone conversations, texting/emailing and on and on.

What Evidence did you leave today and what does it say about how you used your Unique Strengths?

Share something you know made a difference in you being wherever you were!

'IF'...'THEN' - Getting Your Audience to Listen, Think and Grow

I read from the book of Proverbs every day. The promise of the book is wisdom which we all need. There are 31 Proverbs so try reading one a day correlated to the day. i.e. December 2nd read Proverbs Chapter 2.


Proverbs 2 vs 1-5
1 My son, if you accept my words and store up my commands within you,
2 turning your ear to wisdom and applying your heart to understanding,
3 and if you call out for insight and cry aloud for understanding,
4 and if you look for it as for silver and search for it as for hidden treasure,
5 then you will understand the fear of the LORD and find the knowledge


(This scenario is focused on parenting but can easily be adapted for your situation as a manager, coach or anyone in a position of authority. If you want those you manage to think for themselves and grow, try it.)

(vs 1-5) This is a great way to approach children if you want them to think and manage their lives well. This approach should be used as young as possible but probably not before the early teen years.

The approach is the ‘IF’ – ‘Then’ model of teaching and the goal is for teens to self-moderate by thinking through their choices and behavior. By early teen years there should not be any more we can teach our kids about faith, morality, values etc. That is what childhood is for. When we get to the teen years, that is the beginning of adulthood.

The teen years should focus on getting children thinking and making decisions for themselves.
When we approach teens with the ‘IF’ proposition we immediately have an audience. We are not dictating, forcing or threatening. We assume they will have the sense to listen to the next part of what we have to say as well. This is not always true but we need to attribute a sense of common sense if we want a listening audience.

‘IF’….you do this, ‘THEN’ this is what you are likely to expect. You can’t predict but based on common sense and having experienced life, you have the right to play out scenarios.

The ‘IF’ – ‘THEN’ scenario here is a proven formula. It relates to our relationship with God who is the one who backs the ‘IF’ – ‘THEN’ proposition with His promise that if we seek Him we will find Him.

When we preface a conversation about life with the ‘IF’ – ‘THEN’, kids have the opportunity to try it their own way. They have the opportunity to try and succeed as well as prove us right. Sometimes they will prove themselves right and we then don’t lose authority by having been dogmatic.

Parents who never let their kids think should only hope to continue thinking for them well into their adult lives.

How does anyone ever learn to make decisions if they are never taught to weigh options for themselves? How does anyone ever become successful if they only do what ordered to do and never allowed to choose their own path in a particular situation?

As a parent we should be right far more than we are wrong or then we need to start going to our kids for advice.

Parents should not be threatened when their kids are right. That is probably one of the healthiest ways of helping them become mature and separate from us. That enables them to get into life with confidence. As a manager it might free you up from having to supervise so closely because you know they might make another great choice if allowed to.

The ‘IF’ – ‘THEN’ proposition or teaching method used here allows the proposer the time to think through what they are saying. Instead of demanding compliance we have to think about what good or growth might result.

Notice that the ‘IF’ –‘THEN’ proposition modeled here is for success and not used as a warning. Most of the time when it is used it is done so to warn: ‘IF’ you do……’THEN’ these will be the negative consequences. Most of the time we use it in these situations we amplify the consequences by citing the most extreme examples.

Why not use this powerful tool to teach positive behaviors and elicit success? The audience might be more open to listening and great things might happen.

The Greatest Crime in Human History!

Have you ever thought about what the greatest crime in human history was? Hitler killing 6 million Jews, Stalin or Mao killing tens of millions? These were all terrible in their evil and destruction and stand out in history as the worst examples of evil.

What is the greatest crime you could commit? There are many negative and destructive things you could do; murder and rape normally hit the top two spots.

What I want you to think about is what you were given to make an impact on this world with. What do you bring to life? What do you have to give and impact this world with? What makes you unique and able to do what nobody else but you can do?

So what is the greatest good you could do?